Remember, Remember

I want (need) to remember the best day of motherhood so far. It happened last Friday and it was glorious.

I got home that morning, from working out, and Aaron and I were chatting. We always recap the previous night, and so I asked, "Did you get up with Emma at all last night?", because (miraculously) I hadn't. "No", he answered. Shock hit my face, and then tears welled up in my eyes. I promise I'm not this emotional normally. Really.

But Emma had just slept her first full night of sleep. 12 hours of gracious rest.

I'd been waiting 14 months for her to sleep more than 6 hours at a time (she often only slept 4 hours at a time). And we got 12 hours! It's cheesy to blog about how relieved and excited I was to realize she'd slept so long, but this was a mile-marker that was months and months overdue, and it felt life-changing. Don't blame me for being so dramatic about this - sleep is powerful, and a lack of it is even more powerful.

Joseph also contributed on The Best Day of Motherhood.

You need to know that, on a whim, I've been working on a few sight words with Joseph. I'm not pushing him, or expecting him to read before he's 3 or anything; just some fun to see how he does and to get him in the habit of learning. So, written on his index cards are the words "God", "the", "Daddy", "Mama", "Emma" and "Joseph" - words I thought he'd see often enough to have them stick. We try to practice everyday, around the same time we practice his catechism questions.

Well, later the same morning we discovered Emma had found Rest, Joseph was eating a snack in his booster seat, facing the refrigerator. I was washing dishes. He said, "Mama! 'The'! 'The', Mama!" Huh? I asked him to explain and he said the same thing, pointing to the refrigerator. I couldn't believe he might be pointing to an actual word, so I picked him up, and asked him to show me what he meant. Sure enough, right there on a piece of paper on the refrigerator was the word "The", and he pointed to it again and said "'The', Mama!"

He read his first word!!!

I'm not one to sit around gloating about my children, holding strangers captive with pictures and stories of their excellence, beauty and superiority. I try to be realistic. I know I'm biased, after all.

But my little boy read his first word all by himself at 2 1/2!!! I'm so proud I could just burst. I was beaming at Joseph! He made me full of a joy that I couldn't explain. I know it was just a word, but I was awe-struck by him.

After that, I thought about God, and wondered if He delights in His children the same way. Does He beam at our successes and our victories? Does He celebrate with us those tiny things we accomplish, as if we'd just conquered the whole world? Is He proud of our efforts, and rejoicing over our progress?

I had a great day on Friday. I really felt like a Mama. Not a new Mama. But a Mama whose whole life has always been about her children: offering her soft body for hugs, her time for their learning, and reserving her special smiles for them. The rest of my long life will be about their successes, their efforts and failures.

How is it that mothers do that? Give up so much for their children? I know my Mom did. She still does. We're grown up and away from home, but I still hear the smile in her voice as she congratulates me on finally folding the laundry, or not losing my temper with the kids. And, of course, my own children have become her life as well. Surely this is the image of God in us? To so love the ones we created, and for whom we've sacrificed so much, that our own happiness disappears and theirs takes its place?

I'm grateful when I can think like this. It's the sane reminder on days, like today, when I'm not just suspicious (but convinced!) that their existence is to make mine difficult. Why do their noses leak soooo much?! Why does he have the urge to hit everything, including his sister?! Why is she hungry (and cranky) every hour today?!

Yes, reminders are good.