Some days I'm driving down the road, and glancing at the people next to me, shudder to think of stepping into their lives. Some days they look so sad, exhausted by life. As if they dread their destination or maybe are grieving because of where they're coming from. Some days they look like drones or sheep, going along mindlessly, asleep in their wakefulness.
Other times I look over and think that we all have good times and we all experience sorrow, but that our own joys are the sweetest. I wonder if this is me on my healthiest, balanced days? I see some of their sorrow, some of their weariness, but I catch more of their smiles, or their heads bobbing to the music. I see them chattering on the phone or with the kids, like busy ants, content to be buzzing along, building their lives and finding pleasure as they go. On these days, I don't pity them, but I don't envy them either. I see them as the perfect part in this universe that somehow adds up to a whole working harmony.
But then there are days, like today, when I am driving down the road and see the car next to me, and wish with all my heart that I could switch places with them. Some days all I see is an empty backseat that mocks me with its quiet. My backseat is full of three humans who are all fighting for their place, for my attention and energy and time, and have decided that using their loudest, most annoying voice is the way to get it.
Some days, like today, every other driver I get a good look at is a woman with perfectly styled hair, perfectly applied make-up, stylish, quality clothes and well-chosen accessories - all wrapped up in a shiny, new car. A woman I envy. While I, with my staticky, disheveled hair and pudgy, shiny face am awkwardly making my way in this dirty mini-van.
I don't even care about keeping up with the Jones' most of the time. But today I do.
Three minutes later, though, Michael Jackson comes on the radio; the clouds lift and we're smiling and dancing in our seats. I feel so grateful for these people to be silly with, to be free with and to belong to. They're my people and it's just us, a small part of our little community of friends and family, all perfectly placed in the world.